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02 November 2007 @ 11:34 pm
[FIC] Call me  
Title: Call me (0/?)
Pairing: Akame (Akanishi Jin / Kamenashi Kazuya)
Disclaimer: Not mine
Genre: AU, (attempted) Humor, Romance
Rating: R (in later chaps)
A/N: Actually... I don’t have much to say. Baka!Jin X Call Assistant!Kame ♥

I wrote this for 0rien’s birthday! Have a great one, I hope you like it, even if you don’t usually read much Akame. To be honest, I don’t really know... So this is AU, if you don’t like Akame fic you can just ... dunno, pretend that those are OCs? Have fun! ILU! ♥


Yamashita Tomohisa was a very patient man. Of that he was proud, but he also thought that it was absolutely necessary. In his opinion you had to have a certain level of tolerance when your best friend, and current co-worker was Akanishi Jin.

So when Tuesday afternoon found said patient man at his work place, and on the edge of insanity there had to be a valid reason for it.

Yamapi was busy taking the money in the little 24-hour market and currently telling the customers that, unfortunately, they had to pack their things into bags by themselves, because his lovely assistant had yet to arrive. Most customers were understanding and saw no real problem in packing their own bags, others... did.

“What did you say?”
Yamapi fought the urge to simply stuff the old women’s things into a bag and wave her goodbye. Unluckily his employers, too, supported the mentality of The customer is king, so dealing with the problem in his own way was out of question. He tried to explain it again. “I’m sorry, but my assistant is not here yet, so I can’t help you put your things into the bag. If you allow, you seem rather fit for your age, if you could just...”

“For my age? Listen, young man, once you have lived as long as I have, you can start telling me what people my age can and cannot do!”, the old lady said, throwing the cashier glances that could kill. “This is outragous. Do you call this service? Why don’t you help me with my things? Make yourself useful!”

Again, Yamapi found it hard to not do something he would regret later on. Sighing he decided to go through the trouble of getting up and tried not to stumble over his own feet as he made his way to the recently bought ware. Just as he forced his legs to comply though he heard the cheerful “Hello~” chanted by the one person he wanted to strangle most.

There he was, Akanishi Jin, and he was bouncing. A Bouncing Jin was the last thing Yamapi wanted to see at the moment. Pained Jin would have been good, suffocating Jin acceptable as well. But no, that stupid best friend of his was happy when he himself was decidedly not.
Slowly Yamapi sat back down on his chair, flexing his knuckles.

As soon as Jin had entered the shop he knew something was off. If this was because of his superior ability of perception or Yamashita’s death glare, he didn’t know. Maybe it was the fact that his best buddy and partner had not answered his friendly greeting?

Finally arriving at his place, Jin threw the old lady who had apparently caused some trouble one of his cutest smiles. But really, what could a kind elderly woman have done wrong?

Turning his head slightly Jin graced his friend with what he hoped was an apologizing grin. He was late, after all. As he saw the expression on the other’s face however, his own bright smile faltered. Judging by Yamapi’s death glare he could be glad they were currently in public, because public maiming wasn’t something his best friend did quite so often. But that man looked ready to kill. Quickly Jin faced the counter and started to do his job, wondering what the cause of Pi’s dismay was and how he could be cheered up.

“Thank god you are here now!” Jin raised his head questioningly and faced the customer. The elderly women smiled at him. “You should teach your friend some manners. You are always so kind and polite, unlike this person here.”

Jin tried to supress his snicker. Judging by Yamapi’s face and the silent growls coming from his side, laughing was out of question. For some reason his friend really seemed a bit irritated.

“Thank you very much. I’ll make sure to teach him,” Jin said, throwing the old lady another blinding smile while handing her the packed shopping bag.
“Have a nice day!”

Happily, Jin waved her goodbye; the day couldn’t start any better. With a wide grin still plastered on his face, the young man turned around to properly greet his best buddy and maybe find out what was wrong with him. Most of the time, Jin was happy to be Yamapi’s friend. The other was always understanding, funny, reliable and only sometimes...
“Where the fuck have you been?!” ... angry?
“This is your chance to present me with an excuse. And it better be a good one, believe me.”

Okay, scratch that – Yamapi was fuming. Jin decided to use his one and only weapon: Smiling cutely, he blinked. Playing dumb would surely help him escape Pi’s rage!
“Drop it, Bakanishi, it doesn’t work. I’m not some girl, so you can stop acting cute right now!”

Or not.
Jin leaned back in his seat. “I was busy phoning,” he poutet, taking hold of a pen and examining it closely. Really, sometimes his friend had this tendency to exaggerate...

Meanwhile, said friend fought the urge to hit his head on the counter. Repeatedly.

“You haven’t been calling sex hotlines again Jin, have you? I swear, those people have enough money, they are not helpless and desperate, no matter what they tell you...,” he sighed, totally wondering why he was friends with such an idiot.

But Jin just continued, pouting. “It’s not that. I’ve only called the information at the call shop. You know, the one that answers questions as well!”, the man said, now trying to spin the pen on his fingers.

Another sigh. “Jin, how many times have I told you not to bother people... Nobody can tell you how Spiderman goes to the toilet in that bodysuit.”

Jin let out an exasperated sound. “I’ve only asked questions I thought were important,” he claimed, before stopping short, a contemplating expression on his face. “Not that the spiderman question isn’t. But for your information, I didn’t call to get answers.”
Apparenlty happy with his clever response, Jin leaned back again. Sometimes dealing with Yamapi was so troublesome! Did the other think he was stupid or something?

Yamapi let his head drop to the counter. It was hopeless. “Then... why?”, he asked.

“Well… the call shop assistant, of course!”